realityshifted | (no subject)

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doctor who (d8) toshiko sato

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[So Tosh is mostly unchanged when she steps onto the Plane.

Except for one /big/ difference - she happens to be, oh, about nine months pregnant.

Cue freaking out as she notices this.]

Oh my God, what the hell is going on here?

((ooc: Preggers!Naoko is from Spice World - yes, that Spice World - and can be found in a video, complete with musical number and Spice Girls trying to deliver her baby, here.))

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[a bit panicked. no, make that very panicked.]

I don't know who the hell the father is!

[And now he's even more flustered. If that's possible, anyway.]

Oh. Well, do you have numbers?

For the people you've... well, you know. [Oh, God. He didn't mean to do that hand gesture. gjdsfj He almost wishes he were a cat again.]

You could call them up, or something. Try and find him with DNA matches.

Yeah, Ianto, just let me ring bloody 1918. While I'm at it, maybe we can figure out the reduced gestation period of cryogenically frozen sperm!

...but you just said you didn't know who the father was.

Well, that wasn't exactly nine months ago, Ianto!

How long ago was it?

Two weeks!

Looks closer to nine months to me.

[glare!] I know how long it was.

Well, I haven't been myself lately, have I? It's hard to keep track of time when you think you're a cat.

Do you think it could've been something at work? Other than Tommy, I mean.

[exasperated look] I don't know! I've been too busy running to Starbucks every five minutes!

...Starbucks? [Oh, that hurts Tosh.]

Well, I can't figure out the coffee machine, and nobody else seemed inclined to take responsibility, so...[shrug]

[and then the baby kicks, and Tosh looks horrified]

Oh, God, it's moving!

...but it's-- [jkdskajf Tosh, stop freaking him out.]

You aren't going to give birth, are you?

[panicked] I don't know! Do I look like a doctor?

[Okay... calming down. Or trying, anyway.] Right. Well, has your water broken?

[she looks like she's about to burst into hysterics] ...no, it hasn't.

Contractions?

[adsklf] How am I supposed to know what a contraction feels like?

Well, I'm pretty sure you'd have noticed if you had.

Have you spoken to Owen?

[she buries her face in her hands] Oh, God, I don't even want to know what he'll say.

At least he'll have some idea of what to do.

And it'll save you from having to deliver...it.

...you don't really think you might give birth, do you?

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