realityshifted | (no subject)

Entry tags:

*the twins

(no subject)

[Everyone will no doubt notice a new addition to the Plane: a giant Christmas tree. Yes, it’s decorated. Lights, ornaments, candy canes, the works. EVEN TINSEL. Tinsel rocks. Lots of tinsel, really.

There are also quite a few presents stacked under the tree. Each is addressed to a person on the Plane with hilariously appropriate - or possibly inappropriate - wrapping paper.

There is a sign near the tree which reads, “Thank you very much for helping us. Please accept a gift, completely and utterly free. It is our payment. We feel you’ve earned it! Did you know some trees stay green in the winter? But they‘re so prickly.”

At the bottom of the sign a small scribbled note reads, “We tried to bake cookies but even we wouldn’t eat those.”]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It's...well.

They're the ones running the place, more or less. That shop you found, when you first arrived? That's them.

Their experiments don't stop with the Plane. They can change people. Change realities. They'll sell you what you like, for the right price.

[Very, very calmly. Forgive him, Crowley, he's lived with the idea of you being tortured for twenty years--and he finally has the opportunity to do something about those who might--might have already--hurt you.] And how have they changed you?

I traded them my ability to create matter from firmament—and before you ask, it's only temporary. A few months.

[...]

[............]

[.................]

May I ask, dear, what possessed you to trade something like that?

[Er >>;]

It's...a long story.

Yes, well. As was pointed out, this place isn't precisely short on time.

I don't suppose I could distract you with— [he gestures vaguely toward the tree]

[He is looking at Crowley with distinct disapproval.] When you try to distract me with Christmas, Crowley, I begin to be worried.

[The demon sighs]

All right all right.

There's a little girl here I look after from time to time. One of the Twin's experiments turned her into an angel, and she managed to attract the attention of your people. Gabriel and I had a bit of a...disagreement on whether she ought to remain with me or go off and do some sort of angelic work.

I needed a way to keep her out of their sight until the experiment ended.

You-- You... and Gabriel. Had a disagreement. [He sounds rather faint. And oh, then the rest of it sinks in.]

A little girl? Wait-- they. How. How?

[Why no, Crowley isn't grateful that the angel's chosen THAT particular part of his little tale to focus on, instead of the whole "taking care of a little girl" thing. No. Not at all >>;]

I don't know. How does any of it work? They're able to manipulate reality itself, and on a much larger scale than you or I.

[Oh, HE'S GETTING THERE. One step at a time.] I see. [He so doesn't.]

[A long beat, and then the moment you were dreading, Crowley.] And this girl?

[...shit.]

Henrietta. She's a cyborg.

And yes, I'm aware how that sounds.

How what sounds? How did you meet a cyborg, and... you're taking care of her?

The...cyborg part, I meant.

Don't go getting any ideas about me going soft, angel. It isn't like that at all.

Then what are your motives, if I might ask?

[Crowley flounders for a moment]

Well...well what does it matter, anyway? I haven't harmed the girl. All right, maybe I've shown her how to rearrange the letters on wayside pulpits, but she's safe enough, right?

[...yep. Still floundering.]

[...he will not say 'daw.' He will not. It would damage both his dignity and Crowley's beyond repair. He WILL NOT SAY IT.]

[lskdfslk Crowley knows that look. He's fuming anyway :|]

Open your gift, angel.

Of course, dear. [He finds it easily enough, and raises an eyebrow at the wrapping paper. Blue with little red pitchforks all over it.] Droll.

[All right, Crowley can't help but snicker a little at that.]

Funny, it's as if they know you.

[And oh, what's this? A package with red wrapping and little white angels. Az is not smug, really, he isn't.] I could say the same.

[...]

[The demon snatches the package away from the angel.]

Haha, have your laugh. Open your gift.

[He opens the package carefully, peeling back each seam to keep the paper undamaged. There's a delicately carved wooden box inside. He opens it... and nearly drops the lot.]

...oh.

[Crowley doesn't look all that enthusiastic about his own gift, but upon seeing Aziraphale's reaction he frowns and leans over to get a better look at the angel's.]

What is it?