[025]

[oliverplus]

[in the library, Oliver is sitting in one of two large armchairs with a side table between them. he doesn't have a book in front of him, though--he's just holding his black datapad, furiously typing something into it. on the table next to him is a cup of tea and a plate of scones, although they're no longer as warm as they were when he first started. he appears to have taken exactly three bites out of one of the scones, but the cup of tea has been reduced to half-full. at least it's not going to waste]

[Oliver himself is completely oblivious to his surroundings. he's so focused on what he's doing that, most likely, he won't even hear anyone approaching. but he doesn't seem to mind that at the moment; his expression is one of concentration. he looks tired, too. it seems all of the events on the Plane recently are taking their toll on him]

[muttering to himself] Damnit, I can't remember. They're my friends! I should know all this...

[does anyone care to interrupt whatever he's working so hard on?]

Comments

[oliverplus]

[he jumps at the voice] Leela! [realising who it is, he gives her a sheepish smile, feeling silly for being so jumpy] Sorry, I didn't hear you come in. How are you?

Oh, I'm just...trying to remember things from a while ago.

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

What sort of things? Can I help?

[She cannot fault him. Though she is not the sort to jump, Leela has been on high alert since the experiment with the 'candy'. It was impossible to be truly prepared for the future on the Plane, but she intended to do her best.]

[oliverplus]

Ah, um...about people. [he pauses, not really wanting to talk about it, but he still feels awful about how much he has upset Leela by not trusting her in the past. he knows he should tell her the truth; it's just hard to convince himself to] I'm...I'm making a list. About the people here, and the things that've happened. [he swallows hard] So...I won't forget.

[he has a feeling Leela, of all people, will understand]

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

[She nodded. She did not wish him to tell her everything - they all had secrets that they did not wish to share - but she did want him to speak the truth. A friendship could not be built on lies.]

The good and the bad.

[oliverplus]

[he nods, encouraged by that] Yeah. It...well, it wouldn't be the Astral Plane otherwise... [he sighs]

But what about you, Leela? How are you?

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

I am fine. Well. I am glad that everyone has returned to themselves again.

[She still needed to talk to Hiccup.]

[oliverplus]

Yeah. [he even smiles at that] Eithan and Jamie are both okay, definitely. Are you sure everybody else is?

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

We will soon hear if they are not.

I must speak to Jamie. And to Hiccup. They will punish themselves for things they could not control.

[oliverplus]

Ah...yeah...

[surprised] Hiccup? It happened to him, too!? [but Jamie... Oliver cringes at that] Leela, were...are you okay?

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

He became the viking his father had always wished him to be.

I was not hurt. Do not worry about me.

[oliverplus]

Oh, god... Was everyone okay? Do you know?

[he sighs in relief to hear she wasn't hurt] Good.

I...tried to talk to Jamie, after, you know, I helped him. [he frowns, still worried about his friend, too] But I don't think he believed me. He thinks it was his fault.

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

Toothless was able to escape. The experiment did not see fit to give Hiccup the strength to match his temper.

I am not surprised. [Sorrowful, but not surprised.] Did he hurt anyone? With anything other than words?

[oliverplus]

[he nods] That's good, at least... I bet he's helping Hiccup now.

[and Oliver is suddenly extremely flustered] Ah, he...I... H-he...did something. To me. I... [Oliver shakes his head] He's probably still upset about it... [and Oliver is still scared about it himself--not that he wants to tell anyone that. after all, if anything, Jamie would feel worse if he knew]

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

I did not know. [Her voice was filled with sorrow, both for Jamie and for Oliver.] We will help him. We will help everyone who has been hurt by these games.

[oliverplus]

[Oliver doesn't know what to say to that. he nods numbly, but then he remembers she can't see it. when he speaks, his voice is soft:] Thanks, Leela.

We will do. We have to! I'm just... [he sighs] Not sure how...

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

No, neither am I. We must do what we can when we see him next.

[oliverplus]

[Oliver nods again. it's a bad habit. he hesitates, not sure whether to bring this up, but Leela is one of the only people he thinks he can get advice from in this case] He...said he wants to make it right for me. I can't decide what to do. I...it's complicated...

[he pauses] I'm...I'm not as brave as you think I am, Leela.

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

How many times will must you prove your bravery before you start to believe it is there?

[oliverplus]

[that reaction surprises him. it shows in his eyes as he looks up at her] I... [but he stops himself. what can you say to that? he doesn't know what he ever did to deserve such a wonderful friend]

I meant... [he hesitates, taking a deep breath. Leela believes in him, but he doesn't know how to handle this on his own--a fact that doesn't make it any easier to admit. he knows he can trust her judgment, however. and if she believes in him this strongly, even after everything he's done, he knows she won't judge him either] What Jamie did, I'm still... [he sighs] I'm scared, Leela. I could ask the Doctor for help, but then I'd have to tell him what happened. And Jamie wants to help, but he can't--and if he knew I'm scared, he'd just feel even worse! And... [he shakes his head, his expression pained] I don't know what to do.

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

I know. I understand. There is no shame in being afraid, only in letting it stop you from acting.

It was not Jamie. He wore his face, but he was not Jamie and he is gone now. What you must do is remember that.

[oliverplus]

[surprised] What? No! No, I know. I'm not afraid of Jamie! It's... [he pauses, knowing he has to explain but not sure how to do it. he sighs, glancing down at the screen of his datapad. he knows his new project is really just an attempt to help him feel better about this, but hopefully it will be useful in the future, too. and maybe telling Leela will help. he's starting to realise he can't handle this on his own]

He...changed my memory, Leela. A memory, he said. And now that he's Jamie again, he still seems to think it was just the one, so I bet it was! But... [he winces, closing his eyes. it's still terrifying for him to even think about] But he can't fix it now.

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

But how? How could he have done such a thing?

[No. That was not the right question to ask.]

He cannot fix it, but that does not mean that there isn't someone else in this place who can.

[oliverplus]

Whatever the Plane did... [Oliver shakes his head] I don't know. It was...like what the Doctor could do.

[but he grows quiet for a moment before admitting, softly] The Doctor could. But I'd have to tell him what happened.

[anoblesavage.livejournal.com]

You trust him, don't you? You will have to tell him.

[oliverplus]

[defensively] I do! But...Jamie's his friend, too. It'll--you know, upset him. [frustrated] And if I weren't so scared, no one would have to know.