realityshifted | (no subject)

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doctor who (d5) tardis

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...is there any particular reason I awoke this morning with a cheetah beside me and the Doctor nowhere to be seen?

More to the matter: why are they calling me 'Master?'

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[snorts and says mildly] Really dislike her, don't you, old girl? [let it be known he didn't say this meanly]

Don't you, after all she's done to us? After what she made you do?

[shakes his head] Romana's been my friend a very long time.

As have I, but you still let her do those things to me. You weren't the only one hurt when she asked you to destroy your people, Doctor. Does my pain matter so little?

[shifts uncomfortably] It's not that, you know it's not. It hurt me, too.

[shakes her head] And yet you continue to do it. You continue to hurt yourself -- hurt me -- for a people who could care less whether or not you survived! To what purpose, Doctor? You do not need them, not anymore! Not when you have me. So what drives your decision? Why cling to them so desperately, when in the past you ran so long and so far?

[blinks and stares at her in a way that clearly says this isn't something he thinks about often] I hated the Time Lords. Pompous, arrogant, deceiving, selfish... [shakes himself from that] But they needed my help. I couldn't just abandon them, as much as they deserved it.

But you did not ask me, Doctor. It hurt, so much, to see what you did to please them, to save them. To suffer the pain you endured. Why could you not abandon them but you could abandon me, your companions, your own dreams, for the hollow nothingness they gave as their thanks?

[just shrugs helplessly] Because I have to help people. I need to, no matter what happens. I have to fix things.

Is that why you let me be hurt? So you can fix me?

No! That's not why! I don't want you hurt!

But you'll do it willingly enough. You forgive those who cause me pain. Invite them to live within me. How will you protect me now that you've given that man his freedom, Doctor? Did you think of that?

[rubs his eye] It's a better idea, though. He was more likely to hurt you locked up with you. Anyway, I didn't let him escape, exactly...

You freed him of your own accord, then? Freed him of his prison but made me his servant instead, to shelter and feed him?

Actually, it was a bit more like if he broke out, he was free. You're not his servant, 's just he doesn't have anywhere else to live. He's not around all that often.

[crosses her arms] I don't want him living in me. End of story.

I can't exactly kick him out.

You can't? Or you won't?

Both. He isn't doing anything to you, though. Existing, basically, and that's about all.

That's more than enough. [she's really not happy about this, Doctor] Why must you constantly ignore what I say and think and want?

[rubs his neck] Well, how would you solve this? [pauses] Without killing the Master. Or tossing him into the ocean. Or outer space. Or abandoning him in a different era. Or anything like that.

...there are options outside those? [frowns, turning away] I don't...I don't know, Doctor. But just thinking about what he will do to me -- what he did to the me that is with you -- and knowing you allow him to continue to live inside me, I...!

[softly] I'm sorry. I don't know. [runs a hand through his hair] There's not a whole lot I can do to change the situation.

[keeps her back to him a long time, then sighs, body going lax, and finally turns to face him again, reaching out to stroke his cheek] I'm sorry, Doctor. I know you're doing your best. It is...unfair...of me, to make you choose like this.

[meets her eyes, relaxing just slightly] Sorry to put you in this situation, old girl.