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[It’s that time, Plane denizens, for Chris and Ray to appear! They appear at the same time, close to each other, though not yet quite aware of that fact. For now they have their unique individual reactions: Chris is staring wide-eyed and Ray wears an expression that can only be summed up as "wtf." The good news here is that Chris was quickly decided this is an awesome dream.

Spotting the pub floating awesomely in space only confirms this.]

Ray, hey, look. There’s a pub in space.

[Ray sounds less than enthusiastic.] Can see that.

Could go get a pint. Bet it’ll be free. [Because this is his awesome space pub dream.]

Chris. We’re in bloody space. [Sorry, still processing.]

Not bad, is it? Sorta nice, even.

It’s not nice. It’s…bet we stumbled into a gas leak or sommat. Ain’t space, just…somethin’. [Time for logical denial!]

[But Chris likes space dream better.] No, see, this is a dream. Bet there’s superheroes in the pub. That sorta dream thing.

[Ray gives Chris a patented ‘ur dumb’ Look.] You aren't dreamin', you div. And even if you were, why'd you be dreamin' 'bout this?

Cos...I like space. And pubs. 'S cool, you know, a pub out in space. Sorta something you only get to with superpowers. Real special that way.

Yeah? Well if this is a dream, and you got superpowers, use 'em. Otherise, t'ain't a dream.

[Chris, for the record, is attempting invisibility powers! He shuts his eyes tightly and focuses!] There, see? ‘Cept you won’t, will you? [He snickers at his clever and witty joke.]

[Ray just crosses his arms.] And you're supposed to be doin' what?

[Chris frowns, opening his eyes and looking thoroughly disappointed. After a beat, he manages some words.] Yeah, well, all right, why are we in space then?

I dunno.

Yeah but...then, see? Dream makes sense.

Or we're standin' around somewhere, inhalin' gas, and hallucinatin'. [Ray refuses to let it be a dream.]

[Chris is just confused!] There wasn't a pub near us. So what's the pub really?

I don't know, Chris. But stickin' around is just gonna make it worse.

So...pub, then? 'Less we go off into space...

Think we'd have died 'fore then. Space don't have air. [Ray just shrugs because he’s totally lost and going to mull over things.] Yeah, might as well. [Because alcohol solves all problems!]

Yeah, right. Maybe it'll...wear off. Something like that. [And with that last, Chris-version-of-uplifting, the duo wanders off toward the pub, confused and uncertain and they need crazies like you guys to come bother them!]

((ooc: Double intro post for Ray and Chris, yadda yadda, you all know how this goes by now. Colours! This is Ray and this is Chris.))

Comments

[gotitwrong]

[It hates you, Sam, because your name is 'Sam Tyler'. But upon hearing Sam's lovely voice, Ray's demeanour sours.] Boss?

[didorothy]

DS Carling.

[walks over to him and folds his arm]

What's the last think you remember, Ray? What month is it?

[gotitwrong]

December. We just got done dealin' with that body that washed up in the Canal; bloke'd been shot a few times. [Ray pulls a slightly mocking 'concerned' tone to his voice] Forgettin' things, Boss?

[didorothy]

You know what? The Guv can brief you. I'll talk to Chris.

[and he walks straight past Ray to grab himself a drink]

[gotitwrong]

[Ray's response can generally be summed up with 'whatever'. He doesn't want to deal with you either, Sam, so he goes back to minding his own]

[didorothy]

[and 'whatever' is Sam's response to Ray's 'whatever!' So Sam drinks some good old whisky, scowling at the Universe At Large and also Ray]

Ray, do us both a favour and don't piss anyone off with your naturally charming personality. I don't intend on seeing your body torn up by a pack of cheetahs. Or worse.

[yes, he cares. And he feels this is probably the most important thing to tell Ray, too.]

[gotitwrong]

[Ray gives Sam a bit of a confused look, as he is currently attempting to take things in stride and Sam's normal levels of crazy aren't doing anything to assist him.]

Cheetahs?

[didorothy]

The Guv'll explain. Just watch your mouth around here. There are killers here, on this... place. We do what we can, but most of 'em are more than a match for the Guv and I.

[drinks his whisky]

Have you gotten past the 'this is not real' stage yet?

[gotitwrong]

I know how to take care of meself.

[Ray moves about to get himself a drink, and proceeds to act cool. thus his next response]

Dunno what you're talkin' about.

[didorothy]

[gives Ray a look that says 'no, you don't' but doesn't say anything]

This. Here. This place. 'The Astral Plane.' Have you accepted it as real or are you still stuck in disbelief?

[gotitwrong]

I was hopin' it was just a gas leak or sommat like that.

[didorothy]

I had my money on 'drug overdose.' But it isn't any of them.

[gotitwrong]

Then what's it supposed to be?

[didorothy]

Real, Ray. It's bloody real.

Somehow.

[Sam takes another drink, which perhaps conveys his feelings on the matter]

[gotitwrong]

[he takes a drink of his beer and briefly contemplates this]

I'm thinkin' I like the idea of it bein' drugs more.

[didorothy]

So do I. It still isn't.

[gotitwrong]

[he drinks again]

Great.

[didorothy]

When you go back to CID, it's very likely that the Guv, Chris, Annie and I will all be missing without a trace. We'll be able to see each other, but everyone else will think we're missing. The Guv and I can cover for you and Chris easy. We'll have to work something out for you and Chris until we can put CID back together.

[gotitwrong]

What? Why would- [Ray pauses] If that happens, there'll be an inquiry, Boss.

[didorothy]

I know. It's too many missing at once to cover it up the way we did last time. By my reckoning, it'll be a month before we can fix it. If it works the way most missing persons cases work, they'll have us given up on and completely replaced by the third week.

We could tape record messages and send them in through you, but that will also make you the prime suspects in any inquiry.

[gotitwrong]

[he nods] I can handle it. Though I don't fancy workin' with any replacements.

[didorothy]

Annie ended up with DCI Bell when it happened to her. He wasn't the Guv, but she said he wasn't that bad. He was the Guv's recommendation.

[gotitwrong]

[he leans against the bar] I'll give you and the Guv names when I get 'em.

[didorothy]

Thank you, Ray.

[rubs the bridge of his nose - Sam knows Ray will handle all of these problems a lot better than Chris will]

Hey, Ray. The other week, was I blind? I know it's a stupid question. It has to be asked anyway.

[gotitwrong]

[Ray tilts his head and looks up at Sam; you know that way people get when they're minorly annoyed? yeah, that]

Yeah, you were, Boss. You sure you aren't havin' memory problems?