001 - A New Challenger Approaches

[mercwamouth]

[Deadpool arrives in the plane, notices his change in surroundings.]

Hm. That can't be good.

[His thoughts turn to vague memories of a shop and two twins.]

Last time I fall asleep during a Stephen King marathon. Those kids from "The Shining" give me nightmares every time. Not as bad as the Olsen Twins, though...

[He begins to ascertain his location.]

Hm... I'm getting... crossover vibes? Maybe it's another event. Nah. Definitely seems like this place isn't a world I'm familiar with. I'm communicating in text form without yellow boxes or bubbles. So cold.

[A startling revelation comes to him.]

Oh no... fan fiction!? I can only take so much! Listen, you, my other writers were important paid people. You on the other hand are just some bored college student with too much free time. I could kill you if I needed to.

[Trust me, this will be fun. Besides, you're not doing anything until your next series starts up anyway.]

Well... I suppose I have some time to kill. And I guess I would probably just end up watching most of these guys on Cartoon Network anyway.

[There's also a bar over there.]

Hm... OK. I trust you for now. But if I end up sleeping with one of those dudes who look like chicks, you're a dead man.

[Deadpool heads into the bar where he is astonished to find a very colorful cast of characters, some of which he recognizes from his time watching TV in Japan, though he can't place most of them. He slides up a part of his mask so that he may take a drink. His disfigured face is partially revealed for the duration. He has a seat and begins looking for someone to offer him a... warmer welcome.]

I think I like the way you make me think, sir.

Comments

[madamemoiselle]

{She curtsies politely} Of course~! What else would I be? Surely you couldn't believe that I would be a man, would you? But in any case, this lady's name is Diva.

[mercwamouth]

Whew. I was afraid that wouldn't go over well this time too.

Diva, eh? You sing?

[madamemoiselle]

Oh, did it not before?

{Beams} Ah, yes, actually! I really love to sing! Mostly opera, really, but I can do more, uhm, modern things sometimes.

[mercwamouth]

[Trying to sound knowledgeable]

What's your range?

[madamemoiselle]

Ah middle C to the second A, really, but I've been able to get up to as high as G6. It depends on the role I sing, really.

[mercwamouth]

That's... high, right?

[madamemoiselle]

Oh, yes, very high. It's not...a very pretty note really, and when I have to sing that high, I have to practice for a while first. Ah! But let's see...

{She takes a deep breath and sings a short portion of an aria} That would be a G6. It's difficult, but doable.

[mercwamouth]

[Speechless as the liquid from his now shattered glass soaks into his lap]

I have swords. They're shiny. See?

[madamemoiselle]

Ah, oh no! I'm really sorry! I didn't think it would break your glass.

[mercwamouth]

Trust me, compared to my ego, my glass is in good shape. Plus I always try to get red drinks for just such occasions. It's hard to get down to the cleaners these days.

[madamemoiselle]

Oh, still...{Frowns before she reaches over the bar to pull out a stack of napkins, which she offers to him}

[mercwamouth]

[When you turn back, Deadpool's pants are removed, revealing boxers with Spider-Man on them (if you know who he is (you probably don't))]

Oh, thanks.

[madamemoiselle]

{Not like it bothers her, Diva is a skanky ho} Oh, no problem! It was my fault to begin with, so I apologize.

[mercwamouth]

You wouldn't know anyone around here with the power of dry-cleaning, would you?

[madamemoiselle]

Eh? Oh, no, I don't think so. Is it that hard to get one at your home?

[mercwamouth]

No, I just thought it would result in an interesting fight which might clean my pants at the same time. That's a man's dream come true!

[madamemoiselle]

{Laughs} Is it? My, what a strange dream, then!

[mercwamouth]

Are you laughing with me? Wow, this is a sensation altogether new to me.