realityshifted

Current Mood: relaxed

Entry tags:

blood plus (d2) diva

013

{Amshel is back, all is well in Diva's world. Or, that is, as "well" as it normally is. She's opted for a blood transfusion today, so Diva is sitting in a chair with one arm out and taking in a steady drip of blood. It's not something that happens often (especially when Amshel is encouraging her to just go 'hunting'), but it's a nice, peaceful alternative. It's really too bad it's not practical.

But in any case, Diva's lap is full of photographs. Some look very old, while some look more recent. There's not a lot that can be done during the process, so Diva has decided to take a stroll through her memories, humming contently as she flips through the photographs with a fond expression.}

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[Step back. Does not like this.]

Li said that I'm not human. Everyone in my reality says that Contractors aren't human. I don't... if I am human, then why don't I feel things?

Because you've been fooled into believing that you don't feel things. Hei feels things. He feels things for you, even. Do you not return it? Would you be sad if he died? Would you be angry if I were the one to kill him? What would it take for you to throw away that logic and just feel like you're supposed to?

I'm not supposed to!

Says who?

Everything. Everyone. Why are you doing this?

Why listen to everyone else? Contractors are about survival, right? That means they only care about themselves, right?

So why do you listen to what other people tell you? If you're so selfish to be a Contractor, then why should anyone else's words matter?

Because I'm not... I don't know. I don't know anything. That's what I'm trying to figure out.

Then talk to Li. He cares for you. He'll help you figure it out.

I have. He told me I am a Contractor, or something close enough to it that it doesn't matter.

Then talk to him again.

Why would his answer change?

I'm not saying it would change. Just talk to him about how you feel.

...but. [Takes a step toward Diva now] I don't know how I feel.

{Le sigh} What does Li mean to you?

It's a name, from the Chinese 'reason' or 'logic'. It can also mean power, strength, dawn, or blackness. [Because Misaki researches weird things when she's bored/has a crush :| ]

But what does that have to do with it?

....{Facepalm} I mean what does the person mean to you?

I don't know.

Well, then you should figure that much out.

How? ['nother step toward you now Diva o: ]

{Not like she's going anywhere; she's hooked up :|} Well, most of the time you just know. Like being with Li, it makes you happy, or you enjoy his company, or things like that.

...but what do those things feel like?

You've never been in love before?

I... yes. But I don't remember what it felt like.

How can you not remember?

...I don't know. I just can't.

(no subject)

madamemoiselle - 2008-06-22 18:18 (UTC) - Expand

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