realityshifted | Reflecting reflections

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tales of the abyss (d1) guy cecil

Reflecting reflections

[A blond young man in a green tunic and cream coat is seated by one of the ponds near the forest. He's just looking at the water, one knee drawn up, the other leg stretched out. One hand rests on the raised knee, the other is behind him, bracing him as he admires the view.]

[And it is an amazing view. It's a large pond, and deep. With lily pads floating at the edges. But more than that, the stars reflected on the surface of the water are gorgeous, as endless as the scene all around only given a glassy, unreal appearance by the water.]

[More speculatively though, and what makes it a sight that can only really be admired on the Plane, is the way the stars beneath the pond can also be seen. The stars beneath the water and the stars reflected on the mirror-like surface of the water, with the lily pads floating in between, gives the whole thing an incredibly surreal, beautiful serenity.]

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[Asch looks like he doesn't want to be here, but that surprises no one. He crosses his arms. And waits.]

What were you thinking?

[Welp. Starting blunt.]

[He doesn't even try to lie or get out of it. He's seen this conversation happening for a while. Usually Guy is the one who storms off, so Asch stands his ground. And he doesn't flinch.]

I didn't find out who you really were until after I left.

[He looks away.]

I thought you could tell me which one of you was real.

[Every instance of Guy in his memories is completely different. Asch wants to confide in him as a friend, because that's what his childhood memories tell him. But the Guy he knows in his timeline doesn't want anything to do with him, and he's only concerned about the replica. And then there's this Guy from a future Asch has no part of anymore, a Guy who is open and friendly and actually wants to help.

He's so confused. He feels like they're all lying to him, which doesn't help. Asch just doesn't know how to reconcile the past with the world he's in now.]

And letting me nearly kill you proved what? What exactly was that going to accomplish?

[If Jade hadn't intervened...] Did you think that was real?

[He takes a step towards Asch, furious and upset but maintaining at least some calm on the surface. What Asch had said to him then hurt, in part because it was true--true for the experiment and in a way true for who Guy had really been, his true past, as well. But what got to him even more was Asch's complacence, Asch's words now.]

If nothing else, it proved that you could do it.

[The words are honest, brutally so, and he doesn't even bother trying to soften them. His voice is quiet, calm, and empty-- and yet there's something incurably sad about the way he looks at Guy, the way he just takes it.]

Is that...

[Guy stares at Asch, and then, damn it, damn his self control, he is furious. He steps forward, grabs the redhead's arm and drags him forward, shaking him.]

Yeah, there was a time I wanted that! I did want revenge. And if I'd gone down that path...

But I didn't. That may have been me but it wasn't who I am. So what the hell were you trying to prove?

[He looks a little rattled at-- well, being rattled-- and he tries to pull out of Guy's grip. Because being shaken is not conducive to conversation.]

Why the hell are you blaming yourself for something I made happen?

You...

[Guy doesn't let go. Somehow hearing Asch say it like that is even more infuriating. He drags the teenager to the edge of the pond and shoves him in.]

[Because it's the mature thing to do. And he's too frustrated for words.]

[He needs a moment to gather his thoughts somewhat coherently and stop reacting so emotionally. Pull it together, Guy.]

Let--

[And then there is a GIGANTIC SPLASH and flailing. Asch lifts himself up out of the pond looking like a ginger Sadako (http://images.wikia.com/ring/images/c/cb/Yamamura-sadako.jpg), sputtering and pretty pissed off.]

Whatfffffppph-- [pfffffftttttttt HAIR IN FACE HAIR IN FACE. He runs his hands through his bangs and tries to shove them back.]

What the hell is wrong with you?!

That's my line. Do you really want to die that badly?

[Yep. Shouting match. At least seeing Asch wet and dripping and disgruntled is somewhat cathartic, under the general feelings of being really pissed off.]

Edited 2011-09-19 04:04 (UTC)

[He climbs out of the other side of the pond and starts taking off his tabard and sword so that he can keep them from rusting.]

Of course not! When did you get so concerned, anyway?!

[When you died on us. Is probably not the appropriate answer.]

Really? Because you sure as hell don't act like you want to live.

[His tone is no longer heated, just dead.]

Stop acting like you know me. I'm not the idiot you-- [went back to] -- follow around all the time.

[You know what, he's coming over there to shove you back in the water there Asch.]

You think I don't know that? [He stands, fists clenched, before he crosses his arms over his chest.]

I've set aside the past as best I can Asch. Can you? [He told Natalia once that he wanted to start over with Asch, not as the son of Fabre and his servant, but as Asch and Gailardia, just two people. He wasn't lying when he said he thought Asch would be a pretty fun guy, beneath the baggage.]

Or do you even want to? Which are you? Luke fon Fabre or Asch? Make up your mind. Because one of them is someone I want to get to know. The other can rot in hell for all I care.

[Asch had been wandering on his own, lost in thought, resting up, and preparing himself for battle with Oracle Knights. He knows they're waiting; he knows what he has to do.

Then, he notes some commotion--splashing water and yelling. It's weird when he spots himself and Guy upon investigation. He catches the last part of what Guy says... and knows the difference between his answer now and the answer he didn't have back then.]

What's going on? [He finally interrupts, showing himself.]

[FUCKING CHRIST GUY WHY DO YOU KEEP DOING THIS TO HIM.

Asch is at once glad for the distraction and incredibly annoyed at everything. He doesn't need some other replacement of him walking in on his business, even if he doesn't want to answer either question.

He's seething and wet and tired of this.]

Nothing.

[He steps out of the pond again and grabs his equipment, and he doesn't even look at Guy. He lets his back do the talking.]

I'm done talking to you.

That's not an answer.

[Guy snaps it, angry and frustrated, as much with himself for losing his temper and patience as with Asch for being insufferable.]

I'm not done talking to you.

[He grabs Asch's arm before he can move away. No dropping off the Plane. If the man tries he'll just be taking Guy with him. His response to the other redhead is a momentary glare, before he lifts a hand to cover his face, calm himself.]

This might as well involve both of you. I suppose it's only fair, the way I treated you.

[Which one is even his? The one he's holding used to be from his world, and the other could be... Or could be from another world. It's weird as hell, but for all intents and purposes... Yes. It might as well involve them both.]

If you want to know something, then just ask.

[This is to both of them.]

Edited 2011-09-20 02:44 (UTC)

[He's pretty annoyed at the other two for failing to answer his question, but the situation seems pretty complicated. The other Asch had mentioned a major event that changed things from the 'original' timeline--how is one able to tell exactly which timeline is original anyway? Is the timeline that he's from the original one?

Of course, this doesn't seem to be the time to talk about that. His other self is about to up and walk away, which for some reason annoys Asch more than the lack of an answer.

He huffs in agitation before responding.]

I want to know what's happening here. What's this about choosing between being Luke fon Fabre and Asch? [And why are they yelling and fighting ~~in the bath~~?]

Ugh-- let go!

[This Asch is less than inclined to stay, but Guy's grip is like iron and he definitely doesn't want to drag Guy into a different world-- and a different past. He's almost tempted to whack him in the face with the scabbard, but that wouldn't really help things.

He whirls on the blond instead.]

Why do you keep trying? If you say that you let go of the past, then stop cozying up to me like you're guilty of something. It's infuriating.

['Stop trying to save me.'

He looks at his other self.]

This is what happens when I bother associating with these people.

[Guy doesn't let go. Yelling and fighting ~~in the bath~~ is the best way to resolve all issues, at least if you're a Fabre, apparently.]

[He hauls the first Asch around and shoves him towards the second one, so he can face them both when he speaks. Part of him just wants to turn and walk away, but that... That's something he did in the past. And he does regret it. This time he wants to try to communicate.]

You think I don't know what it's like to lose everything?

[To be so filled with hate and resentment and memories of the past that it consumes you and overcomes all your motives into one driving force of hate. He doesn't want to talk about this, but sometimes being vulnerable is the only way to have a conversation. Or a shouting match.]

Van told you what I was. Well it's not a lie. I wanted to kill Luke fon Fabre, my enemy's son. I'm not going to try to excuse myself or my motives. I wanted revenge and I was more than willing to involve innocents in it.

But the person I wanted to kill doesn't exist any more. It doesn't mean his past isn't there any more than it means I wasn't his servant, it doesn't erase those memories. But I'm not the person I was. That doesn't mean I've forgotten the people from then. It may have been bad circumstances, but I remember this kid I knew was a pretty fun guy.

I'd kind of like to get to know him again, as Gailardia and whoever he is now.

So who am I really dealing with?

[He glares from one to the other. The question is for both of them. For all he knows they could have separate answers. He'll accept whatever answers they give him. Being rejected at this point wouldn't surprise him.]

So that's what this is about. [Heh. Now that he has a better idea of what's going on, Asch seems kind of smug. He shoots a disapproving look at his other self before continuing.] The replica and I already sorted this out.

[He hasn't gone back to Auldrant just yet since he wants to be fully prepared for what awaits him. But his mind is still fresh from his battle with Luke--a seemingly fated battle of self.]

I am Asch the Bloody. [His voice is still proud and confident.] But I am also Luke fon Fabre. Both of us are. The replica and I.

[Asch huffs as he's tossed around some more. Honestly, Guy, could you stop hauling him around like he's a toy for once? JUST THIS ONCE? But he listens. Because it's Guy. Because there's a part of him that insists-- despite the abuse and the hurt feelings and the storming off-- that Guy is still some kind of friend. And Asch can't... turn his back on his friends. On people he cares about. He might deny helping them directly, but actions speak much louder than words.

However, it's only his military training that keeps him from wringing out his shirt during Guy's tirade.]

I'm Asch--

[He stops as his other self speaks. Should've expected that. But then--

'I am also Luke fon Fabre.'

He stares hard at his counterpart. He can't... that isn't his name. He doesn't want that name. So why--?]

What? [To say he's furious is an understatement.] Why are you sharing a name with that dreck?!

[They really were different. Guy couldn't really be surprised by that, time had changed him, too. A lot had happened on the journey, for the party, and probably Asch as well. He knew one of them was from near his death, so it made some sense that... There was more resolution there.]

[It didn't mean he was less frustrated with the other for still carrying around the baggage of the past. But considering the fifteen, sixteen?, years he'd spent carrying his own baggage around he couldn't exactly judge.]

That's not the issue here. [It wasn't, they could sort that out later.] You two can sort that out later.

[Only it was also kind of the core issue wasn't it. Oh well.]

The point is if you want to ask me things, if you want to know something from me... Don't do something stupid to try to find out.

[Really the suicidal tendencies pissed him off to no end.] And don't go assuming I'm the same person I was--yeah, that's still a part of me, but I've changed too.

[Asch isn't surprised at his other self's reaction. Nor is he surprised that he'd gone the indirect route learning about Guy. He's learned to do things the roundabout way--to hide his weaknesses, to protect others, to prevent the worst from happening, and so on.]

Heh. Of course, you wouldn't understand.

[He mutters before Guy shuts them down. The other Asch holds so much over him, having been acquainted with the Plane longer, knowing more about it, and maintaining more connections. Asch has quite a bit of catching up to do, but if there's one thing he has that the other doesn't, it's resolution.

It's strange listening to Guy admit that he's changed; in fact, it's difficult to believe. The once-upon-a-time ago Asch had thought they were friends seems so remote from where they are now, and Asch had set their friendship aside as part of a life that wasn't his own. And afterward, Guy had even flat-out chosen the replica over the original. Not to say they couldn't start over, but he wouldn't even really know how to.

'…I've changed too.'

The words barely leave Guy's mouth when Asch turns to him sharply.]

There's something I want to know. You've been avoiding it since I got here. What happened to the replica--I don't mean the one we've all met here! You know which one I'm talking about!

[He huffs a bit and gives a typical answer to Guy:] Whatever.

[Asch isn't really sure when it became a competition. Whatever kinship he might have allowed himself to feel with his other self is beyond gone. Resolution? More like idiocy. His replacement for the keystone timeline is obviously crazy.

Everyone here is crazy.

And he'd leave right now if his other self didn't ask such an obvious question. ... A question he himself never bothered asking. Does he even want to know? It's a future he's no longer part of. Does it matter?

-- Yes.]

You haven't said anything about him to me. Not once.

Reflecting reflections

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