❝Then I'll need one of you to become the test subject.❞

[clinical]

[A large, smooth metallic structure (a fon machine), with a readout machine set up beside it, is brought to the Astral Plane. Connected to readout machine, there is a smaller base. Jade's copy of Physics of the Impossible is set down, a glowing semisphere enclosing it, and information from its analysis is moving across one of the computers.

Doctor Mambo Jade has a small fon machine in his hand, a device for scanning people.]

I've made some experiments on the behaviour of the book that was recovered from the library some time ago. The copy we recovered radiates fonons—the base matter of our world and similar to the atoms of a number of worlds represented here.

In the presence of most individuals from my world, whether capable of fonic artes or not, the fonons radiated do not integrate into their structure. However, for two people of my world able to access the Plane, the fonons radiating from the book mix with our own, in a manner similar to my world's Contamination Effect.

With only two subjects and one book, the sample is inadequate. I would like to request volunteers from other worlds for testing. The process is brief and non-invasive. It merely requires a scan with the device in my hand.

Additionally, if there are scientists from these other worlds, I would appreciate their assistance in calibrating these fon machines to the structures of their worlds, which may be somewhat dissimilar from my own.

[Jade adjusts his glasses and adds,] For those concerned, this experiment is being conducted with the permission of the Malkuth Empire. If anybody gets hurt, you are free to take out your revenge on Emperor Peony Upala Malkuth IX.

[Best friend ever, right?]

Comments

[quecaneatit.livejournal.com]

It's a good emperor's job to take on hardships for their subjects.

And hey, who knows, maybe I'll get stabbed in the back again, too!

[he says this in the same cheerful way someone might talk about getting ice cream]

[clinical]

You make me sick by saying such stupid things. [AUGH you are a WORTHLESS HUMAN BEING.]

[quecaneatit.livejournal.com]

I didn't realize the things I said were so meaningful to you. It looks like that Anise has been schooling you in flattery.

[lamb_of_gold]

Revenge with your blessings, I presume?

[clinical]

Not at all. He is my Emperor. I would be forced to kill anyone who attempted to do ill to him.

[lamb_of_gold]

My mistake.

[cuteliar.livejournal.com]

[Oh my-- Jade wants test subjects, everybody run.]

How'd you find a book like that over here?

[clinical]

[And Anise just trapped herself into being one of his subjects. He's just sad that he doesn't get to use any injections. This time.] I received an anonymous tip-off on where to find it. It's good of you to volunteer yourself for the advancement of knowledge, Anise.

1/3

[cuteliar.livejournal.com]

Anonymous, huh? Hey, Colonel, do you think it was someone from--

[cuteliar.livejournal.com]

[Wait, what?!]

[cuteliar.livejournal.com]

Oh, Colonel! I couldn't!

[promisedsomeone.livejournal.com]

[Asch keeps his distance at first, but the words 'Contamination Effect' caught his attention at least. He decides to brave whatever Jade might toss at him. It's too late to stop what's coming, anyway.]

What? That shouldn't be possible!

[He says this, but it's actually mildly terrifying. He doesn't want shit messing with his fonon structure any more than it already has. /SIDEWAYS GLANCE AT FOMICRY]

[clinical]

I was hoping you'd volunteer for testing. [Despite the jocular words, the tone is much less teasing than usual. If these alter the fonon structure of people, then double-checking Asch's structural integrity is high on Jade's list of priorities.] Stand still a moment. [Because speaking is volunteering, correct? Jade lifts the device in order to scan Asch.]

[promisedsomeone.livejournal.com]

[The redhead's eyes flash a dangerous shade of green. He wants answers, but none of them are readily available and that makes him ANGRY. He knows the importance of tests, though, and while he's not all that comfortable with it he stands there and lets Jade point the scanner at him.

He only trusts Jade out of necessity. He's the father of fomicry after all.

A few seconds of gritting his teeth and trying to resist the urge to smash things, and then he asks in a low, thick tone:]

What did it do to me?

[archaeologist.livejournal.com]

Fonons?

[she looks at the book. She drops and returns with another copy of Physics of the Impossible. She has about ten more copies at home, so giving up one for Science isn't that big of a deal.]

I can't say the idea of being a test subject is too appealing, but would another copy of that book improve your sample?

[clinical]

As I said, the process is harmless. [Cheerily:] Don't worry. I don't dissect live humans any longer.

The second book will be appreciated. I can compare the scans.

[archaeologist.livejournal.com]

[flatly] Well, that's a relief.

[she tosses one of her copies of the book at to Jade]

[bowtied.livejournal.com]

[a shiny machine!]

Oh, that looks all sorts of gizmo-ey, doesn't it?

[he knocks on the fonon machine]

[clinical]

Now, now, try to be careful. It's not a toy for children.

[bowtied.livejournal.com]

Oh? And what is it when it's at home?

[destinedking.livejournal.com]

[he hears 'experiments' and 'scientists']

You're a doctor of some sort?

[clinical]

[Technically, yes!] I am. I'm looking into something found in this place a while ago.

[destinedking.livejournal.com]

Does it have anything to do with people being pulled out of their own realities?

[endofruins.livejournal.com]

I'm not really a scientist, but if you don't care about stuff like that, I can help you with your machines.

[clinical]

Help with the machines would be appreciated. Fontech wasn't my speciality. [Goddammit Saphir, you're never there when you might actually be useful.]