★★★2

[didorothy]

[Sam Tyler is not daft. Really. Even if he appears on the plane holding a paper out, as if expecting it to disappear. He sets the paper down, staring at it intently, before vanishing off the plane and reappearing to check if it’s still there. It is, and everyone can see it. Next, he tries this with a particularly ugly lamp which (if the clothing doesn’t give it away) certainly tells you exactly which era Sam is stuck in. When he experiments on this with his beloved television, he drags it back home immediately rather than risk losing it. Then he brings along a chair and a radio. He sits on the former, hand over mouth, thinking for a moment. He fiddles with the radio, but only gets the sound of machinery under very fuzzy reception. Finally, he appears empty handed, fingers curled as if he was holding someone’s wrist. Chris, apparently, cannot be dragged onto the astral plane]

Hm.

[Sam immediately flips out his notepad and starts writing things down]

Comments

[theguv.livejournal.com]

[just looks at him, lips pursed, then disappears, only to reappear a few minutes later in the Cortina, out of which he steps to lean against her roof] Well now! This definitely spices things up a bit, doesn't it, Dorothy?

[didorothy]

[that would be Sam staring at you, Gene. So of course he goes to do what he does best - act creepy, an act executed in this situation by feeling up the car to make sure it's real. Then he looks at Gene, eyebrows raised] But Guv, there's nothing for you to crash into here.

[theguv.livejournal.com]

I do not crash, you nonce bastard. [cuffs Sam upside the head] And don't touch her. She's not here for your 'investigation,' Tyler. She's just better to look at that your bloody paper trail.

[didorothy]

[considers that an affectionate cuffing] You just brought your car here to look at, then?

[theguv.livejournal.com]

Well, and maybe run some little shit bastard over. Eithe way, beats your lampshades there, Martha. Planning on going into interior decorating?

[didorothy]

Well, if this policing business doesn't work out, I thought it might be worth looking into. Not with this thing, though. [taps on the lamp] God, the seventies...

[theguv.livejournal.com]

...you really are a Goddamned faerie, Tyler. [pauses, then grabs said lamp] This is off my desk!

[didorothy]

...

[oh, shit]

--I bought one just like it?

[theguv.livejournal.com]

You jackass! [here, Sam, have another thwap upside the head] What else are you taking from my office while I'm not around, you bleedin' ponce?

[didorothy]

[does not consider that one affectionate] It doesn't even matter, does it? As far as you're concerned, it never even happened. I bet I could burn every last file in there and it wouldn't affect you one bit.

[theguv.livejournal.com]

And you miss the point entirely. 's my office and whether I exist or not, nobody touches my things! [wouldn't really care if Sam burned all the files but isn't about to say that]

[didorothy]

[so very close to rolling his eyes and telling Gene to 'blow it out yer arse'] That's very nice, Guv. Anything else?

[theguv.livejournal.com]

Not really, no. Any leads yet on that murder, or have you just been shoving your thumbs up your ass while playing at redecoratnig?

[didorothy]

Multitasking, Guv. Made a lot easier when time doesn't pass in one of the places you're working. [vanishes for a moment and reappears with a file folder] A carbon copy of everything we've got so far. DS Carling and I have been doing interrogation of suspects, WDC Cartwright has been looking into history, and DC Skelton is handling witnesses with DC Tippett. I've got DS Howard investigating a set of robberies at the north end of Deansgate and DS Scott covering an assault on Canal Street, while DCs Cunlife and Burges look into a call from Sackville Park.

[theguv.livejournal.com]

[...] Right, well. Any idea who offed her, then? What was it, an angry boyfriend, got a bit feisty, she wouldn't put out, her snuffed her? Or some crack pot scum out to get his kicks using little girls? [taps his skull] All your fancy 'multitasking' isn't gonna mean shit if you can't make the decision [snaps] that this or that bloke did it, Tyler. So come on -- who did it?

[didorothy]

[folds arms] No. I don't work like that, Guv.

[theguv.livejournal.com]

Well maybe you should. There's some little girl out there who's been murdered and we have an obligation to the parents to find her killer, so who is it, Tyler?

[didorothy]

We have an obligation to find her killer, not collar whoever we can get to confess to the crime.

[theguv.livejournal.com]

And while you dilly-dally around with your bleedin' 'multitasking' the killer could strike again. Nick 'em all and let the Law decide -- and I am the law.

[didorothy]

Graham Bathurst. Convicted for murder in under fourty-eight hours after the investigation began. Jury foundd him guilty and he got twenty years. But he wasn't guilty, was he, Guv? The real killer walked away. I am not rushing this investigation.

[theguv.livejournal.com]

That was one mistake, Tyler. One in how many? You get that killer off the street and you get him off now. [takes a deep breath, paces, swig and a smoke] Right. The bird's alive in my world, right? Give me a list of suspects. I'll find the bloody bastard myself.

[didorothy]

...if she's alive, then there is no killer.

[theguv.livejournal.com]

No, but if she's alive, her killer is, too. And if she dies in your world, she could bloody well die in mine and I am not letting that go to chance. You let me see how your suspects treat her while she's breathin' and you have a killer in 24 hours, got it?

[didorothy]

[flips through the folder until he finds a list and puts it on top of the folder, and then hands the whole thing to him]

[theguv.livejournal.com]

[takes it, jabbing at Sam's nose] 24 hours, Tyler. And you get me a Party Seven, got it?