realityshifted | (no subject)

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life on mars (d1) gene hunt

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[so, some of you may be wondering where Gene has been

well, I'll tell you where Gene has been. he's been scouring this entire bloody place for a good flask of whisky, but know what he finds?

sake

and only sake

oh my. someone's in a bad mood]

The bloody hell is this piss? I've had better stuff come out the bleedin' tap at home. Pigs would shit better drink than this. [grumblegrumble takes another sip and >| face] Damn Japs never did anything right.

[ooc; Replies will probably come tomorrow]

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It seems that Dionysus does not smile upon this public bath, and so we are cursed with water made from rice. I should even take the old mead that sat as a reminder of old within my palace over it.

Who the hell makes booze with rice? It's the bloody worst idea I've ever heard.

Apparently the Japanese! From the little I know of their history, it would make sense, since I don't believe that grapes can grow in the country, nor can any of the other plants used to make alcohols that can actually wet the tongue. Honey may have been available, but I do not know. Best to say that they tried with what they had.

Though I have to say, you've never really drunk beer until you've had Persian beer! The best I ever had in my life! I felt as if I was intoxicated for days.

More a liquor fan, myself. I'll take a pint over a beer any day.

...wouldn't mind trying it, though.

Yes, but true liquor is a more modern invention than the alcohols I sampled on my conquests. I quite enjoy it, but I think nostalgia keeps me to wine, beer, and occasionally mead if I'm in the mood for it. If only I could go back to Persia and bring some with me, I would be a happier man for it!

Conquests?

{Laughs}

Indeed! Though I've held many titles and names, you may have heard of me, for I am Alexander III of Macedon! No less than the King of Conquerors, as two other famous kings have called me.

[this look?

yeah, says he doesn't believe you]

Hou, you doubt? Fair enough, I suppose, but I could even show you my mighty army, if you should so like! They followed me past the grave and are only a call away.

That so? Lemme see, then.

Then behold, my peerless army!

{A whirlwind suddenly appears, and the pleasant atmosphere suddenly changes to scorching heat, and dry wind that kicks up sand from a desert that isn't there. The casual jeans and t-shirt he had been wearing are replaced by his old battle armor and mantle. But the hot wind stops, revealing an endless field of sand, with a clear blue sky above. And like a mirage, soldiers each heavily armed and distinct from each other appear, only to be followed by a mighty horse that gallops to Alexander's side}

And so, upon the hot sands of Persia, standing before my mighty calvary and even Bucephalus, can you deny my birthright?

[...that's pretty impressive, damn]

You do that a lot or just for special occasions?

Ha, just special occasions! The last time I summoned my army, it was to defeat Assassin, so seeing my men is long overdue.

{Rider gives them a wave, and in return, they raise their spears or shields or whatever they have with a shout before Gene and Rider return to the onsen}

As I heard, summoning them is close to a miracle of magecraft! I know nothing of that, but everything of true loyalty.

Assassin, huh?

[sighs, pulling out his cigs. he has no idea what you just said, Rider] Sure it is.

Indeed! For I have been summoned by a mage to wage a small war over the possession of the holy grail. Six other great heroes, or villains, in some cases, that I have to fight in order to seize it, but not even King Arthur can stand against me.

Sure. Gotcha.

[doesn't believe a word of it]

{You think Gene would have learned to believe unbelievable shit after a year or two on the Plane. But then he wouldn't be Gene.}

So then, with such a grand introduction on my part, do you think you could match it?

[you would, but haha, it's Gene]

If I could leave this bloody place, you bet I could.

[cause he'd totally bring the Cortina]

Oho? Then what from your home is so impressive?

My car.

Ah, yes! Those are impressive inventions indeed! If only Waver would allow me, I would love to try my riding skill in one. Ah, one that could fit me, anyways! The world has grown smaller in many ways since my reign.

[osubgso YOU ARE ALWAYS SO HAPPY]

Yeah, well, you're not getting a try with my Cortina. No one touches her but me.

Ha, it is female? How surprising! I was not under the impression that those vehicles were treated as horses and named, but I suppose I can see its charm.

I've got three loves in my life: My whisky, my wife and my car.

{Laughs}

And good ones to have! I can only admit one love of my own, but it's hardly of importance. Not that I kept it secret.