001 - Allons enfants de la Patrie

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

[Javert appears on the Plane, wearing his typical hat and frock coat, looking reasonably perplexed.]

Have I... fallen asleep while on patrol?

[The thought of doing such a thing immediately brings about shame.]

NO! This is unacceptable. I must awaken at once and resume my duties.

[He closes his eyes for a few seconds, concentrating calmly. If he were focused on returning to his reality, he might have just done it, but all he was focusing on was waking up, and he is not asleep. He reopens his eyes, expressing great frustration at the fact that he remains.]

Damn! Why can I not wake up?!

[He nearly loses himself and throws his hat on the ground, but stops himself and ponders.]

I must have been accosted. I must have been knocked over the head by some criminal and I must be unconscious. Trapped within my own mind.

[He places his hat back on his head and a focused calm overcomes his demeanor as he brandishes his cudgel]

I must have let my guard down for a moment, but I will find the one responsible and he shall be brought to justice for this... inconvenience.

Comments

[contract_star]

[...lol wut.] Uh...excuse me?

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

Only in my wildest dreams could a China man be so dedicated as to learn the tongue of civilization and order.

[contract_star]

[...]

[Hei checks his wrist for a nonexistent watch, then, deadpan,] Oh look at the time, I'll never be able to round up enough human babies for dinner at this rate. I'd better get to it.

Be seeing you. [And he starts to wander off.]

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

Savage.

[contract_star]

[Musingly,] Some kittens too, for side dishes...

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

Continue to mock me.

[contract_star]

[Over his shoulder,] It's too easy with people like you, sir.

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

[He begins to walk toward Hei, cudgel in hand]

I am placing you under arrest.

[contract_star]

I am not in any way, shape, or form even close to being under your jurisdiction.

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

[A very hideous smile]

I beg to differ. This is my dream and I am French, through and through, making my dreams French as well. If my dreams are in France then you are within the arm of French law and therefore within the reach of my arm. Now will you come quietly?

[contract_star]

...That was a fascinating stretch of logic.

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

[You did not answer his question, Hei! Cudgel to the head!]

[contract_star]

[Hei dodges and catches the cudgel, gripping it hard.]

You should be more careful around here. Some people will kill you just for looking at them funny.

[Evil smirk.] Anyway, haven't you heard that all of us are godless ninjas?

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

[Tears the cudgel away and keeps at it]

I would rather die than allow mockery being made of the law and those who uphold it. And what is a "ninja"?

[contract_star]

[Hei dodges easily.]

You did mock me first. Though you must be from earlier than I thought, if you've never heard of ninjas...

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

[Javert is a bit frustrated, but he stands erect once again and evens out his uniform. He then speaks as though he forgets he's in a dream.]

It was not my intent to mock you, Monsieur. I just find you... odd. Though perhaps I should admire the power of the French language to bless the tongue of any race, should they have the will to learn it.

[contract_star]

[This guy is certifiable! Hei can't help grinning a little.]

So am I not under arrest?

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

Well, I suppose I was a bit hasty with my initial attempt to have you arrested. However, you did resist arrest, which is also grounds for me to arrest you. Though, since I have reneged on the initial arrest attempt, I suppose I must in turn forgive your resisting arrest.

[That made sense in his head]

Consider this "letting you off with a warning". It is not something I tend to do, so count yourself lucky.

[contract_star]

[Smirks.] Your logic is going to be interesting around here.

Well, thanks, I think. [He turns away.] Though I'm not sure it has anything to do with luck.

You can go home by thinking about it, by the way. [And he drops.]

[bringme24601.livejournal.com]

Hmph. Strange man. I wonder what he--

[Oopsdrop]