005

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

[Have a Handy humming to himself in the kitchen as he goes about getting ingredients out of pantries and the refrigerator.  After speaking with Ray and Chris earlier, he is almost certain he knows how to make pancakes.  He has never actually done this, however.  He figures now would be as good a time as any to distract himself by testing out this assumption]

Comments

[savagestime.livejournal.com]

The majority of my desires aren't half as acceptable as eating straight from the fork, but at least they are civilised.

[thoughtfully]

When I take over the universe, I think I'll have someone to feed me. Not that I'll use them all the time, but it was quite a lot of fun as Caligula.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

Maybe, but I don't really want to find it half attacked by the time I go for a piece.

[hesitates, because he doesn't want to make himself look like an idiot twice now, but curiosity gets the better of him]

Caligula? Really?

[salvagestime.livejournal.com]

[The Doctor cuts a large section and just drags that over to eat freely from.]

You're really fond of that time, aren't you?

[savagestime.livejournal.com]

[The Master grabs the fork away from the Doctor]

Get a plate.

[to Handy--]

It's not another thing you've forgotten. It happened to us, and only us.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

I didn't -

All right, then, what happened?

[salvagestime.livejournal.com]

[He feels like whining but fiiiiiiine, Master, you whore. He gets a plate now and gives a pointed, "there are you happy can I have my fork back?" look as he puts the cake on the plate.]

Someone fashioned himself to be the Emperor of Rome. Also had me locked locked away, not that any of it's too surprising. It explains the horse well enough.

[savagestime.livejournal.com]

Say "please," Doctor.

[shrugs]

The horse was a great deal more intelligent than the rest of the Senators. It was a bit like being around the High Council, only I could kill people who annoyed me.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

[seems thoughtful for a moment]

Maybe you'll pop up again as Caligula in the other realities too, the ones where the Doctor lost you.

[salvagestime.livejournal.com]

[He sighs and holds out his hand.] Please?

[savagestime.livejournal.com]

[gives him the fork]

He didn't lose me. I left him. It's not the same thing.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

[rolls his eyes]

Lost, left. Whatever. The ones where He doesn't have you, then. Or you don't have Him. However you want to phrase it.

[salvagestime.livejournal.com]

[He's just going to accept his fork and eat his cake.]

Connotative differences.

[And then more eating. That was, however, his version of not taking sides.]

[savagestime.livejournal.com]

He doesn't have me, and the connotations matter.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

Well it was just a thought.

[and he's going to eat cake now, because it's delicious and it's cake]

[salvagestime.livejournal.com]

[Cake is indeed delicious.]

Connotations are always such a strange thing in languages.

[savagestime.livejournal.com]

They're dangerous. They're the parts of the web you make shiver when you step on only a point of it, and you'd best hope there's no spider around to catch you for it.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

I'll make sure to keep them in check, then.

[and he is just going to continue to eat his delicious, delicious cake]

[salvagestime.livejournal.com]

Did you really need to use an analogy like that?

[savagestime.livejournal.com]

Just because overgrown arachnids killed you that one time...

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

[not a big fan of the spiders here either, but he's just going to eat his cake and stay out of it.]

[salvagestime.livejournal.com]

I have rather bad experiences with spiders.

[savagestime.livejournal.com]

I like them. We should get a pet spider.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

[looks up from his cake to give the Master a look]

Wanting something purely to spite him hardly seems respectful or any of the other attributes you claim to have in excess.

[and then he's back to cake, delicious cake, he loves cake it does not cause distress, only deliciousness]

[salvagestime.livejournal.com]

[The Doctor approves of that interjection, Handy.]

We're not getting a spider.

[savagestime.livejournal.com]

Some things are worth being sacrificed for the sake of entertainment.

[guess who is waking up with a spider in his bed soon?]