they all assume I'm a patient because of the cane

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

Dammit, and I was hoping that there was a new strip club in town. There's only so many times you can watch a hooker pole dance before it's the same thing every time you go. Or, with the cheaper ones, it literally is the same every time.

{He takes that as a chance to pull out his Vicodin and swallow a few}

This really is a bad trip, though. Which is funny, because I never get bad trips. I would almost say that I'm asleep or hallucinating, but since I haven't gotten shot or in an accident lately, the second one is kind of unlikely. Oh, that and the fact that my ear still hurts from talking to Cuddy five minutes ago, can't be asleep.

There's a lot of sci-fi plots that go like this, I think. Random person ends up in a random place, hijinks ensue. But unfortunately, I'm not a good candidate for those kinds of things. Bum leg kind of prevents me from running away from the threat of the week. I could totally take an alien in a cane fight, though. But bad science fiction plot devices aside, I guess I've got...

{He looks at his watch}

"X" number of minutes until my trip is over and I get to go back to my very happy job of avoiding clinic duty for another hour and a half. With any luck, whatever drug made me think about some kind of weird observatory with a...coliseum in it will last long enough that I can miss the whole thing. Or at least tell Cuddy that I'm too hungover to do clinic duty so she'll have to get a nurse to do it. Like she already should be.

Hopefully I can look back and laugh at this later, since it sucks now. Or maybe I can just figure out what it was and give some to Wilson, and laugh at him.

...Actually, that sounds like a plan.

Comments

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

[slides in, quite literally. He may or may not have some rubble from some building on his shoulder]

You're timing your time here? Ooooh, good to know I'm not the only one working on out-experimenting the experimenters.

Experimentations. Experi----well, you know.

[didorothy]

[frowning at him, arms folded]

It isn't a trip.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

...Wonderful.

See, that's pretty novel. I wouldn't imagine that I would get a guy on crack in my trip. That's counterproductive.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

[stares for a moment, letting House finish his monologue]

I'm fairly certain you could probably just carry on this conversation on your own, but unfortunately or fortunately, depending on your perspective, you're not hallucinating.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

{He frowns right back}

Then what is it, oh wise one?

[didorothy]

You can reduce the sarcasm a few levels. I think you're dripping it onto the floor, and someone will have to clean up that mess.

It's real.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

Hallucinating and bad trip, those are kind of separate, though. One is induced and the other is...well, induced, but not from taking drugs, usually. That one is more like brain damage.

[lamb_of_gold]

Unfortunately, no drugs were involved in you being brought here.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

As long as it's not me, then it's fine. That's what nurses are for.

And real is such a relative thing. I'm sure that you think it's real, but then I get to wake up, and in some kind of wonderful irony, probably get stuck with a clinic patient that bears a striking resemblance to you.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but well. It's sort of the all squares are rectangles but all rectangle aren't squares logic. Bad trips usually involve hallucinating. But not all hallucinating involves drugs, as you're obviously aware. So I felt hallucinating was a more all encompassing word. But either or works. Not a hallucination or a bad trip.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

How do you know that? I mean, Thirteen seems like a frisky girl, she could have slipped something in my drink to try and jump me.

After all, your hair is lavender.

[lamb_of_gold]

Because I have been coming here for almost a year now. You may return home if you wish - simply think about it.

Yes it is. It has been my whole life.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

Of course I'm aware. I'm a doctor. {And a user on occasion, but that's a secret. Kind of.}

Then that's two off my list. Bad science fiction plot seems so unlikely, though.

[cyfor.livejournal.com]

[...] You talk a lot. [She sorta tuned out after the first paragraph.]

[didorothy]

More likely, you'll bump into me on the street and start talking to me, and everyone else will think you're crazy, 'cause they won't be able to see me. They'll just see you, blathering on to yourself.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

That's almost cool. Quite the elaborate hallucination. Just go "Beam me up, Sco--"

{And he drops off the Plane. Which was unexpected. And it should be humbling, but House is never humble. But he does come back shortly, frowning}

I don't know which is worse. Going back and getting caught skipping clinic duty, or coming back here.

[lamb_of_gold]

The latter, because when you return again, it will be to the same time you left.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

I didn't expect the Cheshire cat to talk back.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

Well, everyone already thinks I'm crazy, so that's fine. I get to balance it out by being good at my job.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

Damn, and I thought I had found a novel way to skip clinic duty. There's only so many times you can watch soaps with Old Man Jenkins.

[didorothy]

So you normally walk around talking to people who aren't there?

[oh look, Sam has a kindred spirit!]

[cyfor.livejournal.com]

Just the mirrors?

[lamb_of_gold]

If it's any solace, you can spend as long as you wish here - there is a kitchen that restocks itself.

[house-1-god-0.livejournal.com]

It's more like walking around talking to people that I wish weren't there.

[handysparehand.livejournal.com]

Or it could just be a very bizarre reality. Which is what I've been assuming the entire time.