realityshifted | Sale One

[Lau is standing on the astral plane with an opium pipe to his lips. He doesn’t seem to notice he’s on the plane at the moment though, for he’s talking out loud to himself as if someone is there and actually listening to him. Not that anyone would be otherwise in his own reality, but he sure assumes that someone is right now.]

Now Earl, you shouldn’t get so uptight over situations like this. You came to see me after all, correct? So relax! You see, I already know why you’re here. Of course you would come to me when no one else would bother to help you right now, except your Butler since he is here with you at the moment, but even he can’t compare to the charm I have in getting what I want from other traders. Whatever it is you need I will get it for you, Earl. I know it must be of great importance no matter how illegal it may be for you to get your hands on it! ... ...

[During his entire little speech, he had become quite serious business – Until he simply smiles and tilts his head as if he suddenly has no idea what’s going on at all] So what is it you’re here for, Earl –

[ He looks around the astral plane.]

... Earl?

[There’s no Earl on the plane at all. Lau simply sighs, and gives a strong few puffs on his pipe before he blows out the smoke he had inhaled from that.]

I must be hallucinating once again! It’s even the same location this time. How curious ... I’m usually so careful when melting down the right amount of opium so this doesn’t happen while smoking...

[Yet, here he is. Still smiling and looking out of place.]

... So where am I?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Detectives~! I wouldn't dare keep offering now that you two have clearly declined my product. It would be unprofessional.

[He does look curious about what Chris says though] Who would have my head~? Are you two from Scotland Yard?

[Ray stares at that. then eventually replies] ...No. We're outta Manchester.

[Chris nods!] Guv and boss are the DCI and DI.

Ah! Manchester~! [Just looks even more confused at all of this. He's trying to make sense of his hallucinations... He can't complain.]

I run the Chinese foreign trade in London. As far as I know, the only sect who can have my head is Scotland Yard~ That is if they ever found out about my opium den. I doubt they will with the Earl watching out for me.

[Just smiles.] DCI? DI?

Detective Chief Inspector and Detective Inspector. [Ray wishes he could cross his arms. damn the sling and damn his shoulder] Don't care if anyone's got a claim on ya, either.

[Chris is standing like the fail back-up he is.] So you've got someone bribed?

I see! So you all know each other~? [How cute, his hallucinations are in little groups now.]

Bribed? Not at all. I just have a strong friendship with a rather powerful family very close to the Queen. Her Watchdogs.

Yeah.

[he gives Chris a look] Threats, then?

Aye, keeping them quiet that way?

Threats?

[Ray rolls his eyes] Don't act dumb.

[firm nod!!] Yeah, give'em some roughing up to see it your way?

Act dumb? I would never threaten the cute little Earl~! ... He's the one who threatens me, you should know. He takes his position very seriously!

Earl?

Might be a name.

You don't know what an Earl is?

[Ray gets a very indignant tone] I know what an Earl is. Chris is just a div, so don't pay him any mind.

[Chris just made a "D:" face but of course he is ignored.]

Ah~ Well, the Earl is the Queen's Watchdog. Whatever She asks of him to do, he will do it for Her. It's as simple as that. I've helped him plenty of times.